Category Archives: Spiritual Growth

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Men’s Group: Calvary Road, Dove and Lamb, Chapter 5

This chapter’s focus is once AGAIN: humility.  Only when we are broken and willing to be filled can we truly embrace and grow in the Holy Spirit’s teachings.  I have included this amazing statement below, study questions, and Dave’s insights.
Study Guide statement, pg 18:  “Remember the goal of the Christ-life is NOT to be a better Christian.  It is to be conformed to the image of God’s Son, by the Holy Spirit’s conquest of self.  Victory is not me overcoming my sin, victory is Jesus Christ overcoming me. When He overcomes me, moment by moment, the only Biblical response is humility and brokenness, which brings on the much needed grace of God. GLORY!

study questions:

1. Take a few minutes to meditate on this statement:  “But inasmuch as there is no past or future with God, but all is present and timeless, there is a sense in which the suffering of the Lord Jesus for the sins of which we have not repented is present too. What a vision it is when we see these sins wounding and hurting Him now!”
2. How can we be more like the Lamb?
  • humility–examples at work and at home?
  • submissiveness–examples at work and at home?
  • self-surrender–examples at work and at home?
3. What does Hession mean by this statement: “Victorious living and effective soul-winning service are not the product of our better selves and hard endeavours, but are simply the fruit of the Holy Spirit. We are not called upon to produce the fruit, but simply to bear it.“
4. “A saintly African Christian told a congregation once that, as he was climbing the hill to the meeting, he heard steps behind him. He turned and saw a man carrying a very heavy load up the hill on his back. He was full of sympathy for him and spoke to him. Then he noticed that His hands were scarred, and he realised that it was Jesus. He said to Him, “Lord, are you carrying the world’s sins up the hill?” “No,” said the Lord Jesus, “not the world’s sin, just yours!”
What are the sins that Jesus is carrying?

Dave’s Insights:  You had to be awake and ready to start this session because Drew got your brain going right out of the gate. Here is what we led off with: Take a few minutes and mediate on this statement, “But inasmuch as there is no past or future with God, but all is present and timeless, there is a sense in which the suffering of the Lord Jesus for the sins of which we have not repented is present, too. What a sin it is when we see these sins wounding and hurting him now.”

Robby said we tend to focus more on the forgiveness than the severity of the sin. I know I have been guilty of that, “I am forgiven” attitude, rather than taking the time to truly realize the impact of my sin and that it is wrong. I have come to realize I do not feel forgiven until I spend time with God, confess my sin and ask for His forgiveness.

The next question asked how we can be more like the Lamb. It gave suggestions for exploration in three areas, humility, submissiveness and self-surrender. Bucky talked about self-surrender. Bucky said sometimes he has hidden expectations and gets distressed when the outcome is not what he expected or wanted. I think we can all relate to that one, can’t we? We all have expectations. What do we do, or how do we respond when that job interview doesn’t get us the job, our finances aren’t where we would like them to be, or, the old, “I never thought I would be in this situation at this point in my life (it isn’t what I expected).” Funny thing is, a song by a fairly new Christian says “Welcome to wherever you are. God makes no mistakes; you are exactly where you are supposed to be.” How true, God has a plan for you. That plan may not be what you want or expect but it certainly is where you are supposed to be. So, maybe in your time with God, you can ask Him, “Lord, how may I serve you in this situation?”  If you keep your heart open, God will use you in that situation, no matter what it is. And, I believe you will both benefit from it.

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Men’s Group: Calvary Road, Highway to Holiness, Chapter 4

The road to Holiness:

  • As a Christian, you will always remain on the road to holiness
  • The journey is called: sanctification
  • ways to not stumble on the road:
  1. physical exercises–kneeling at your bedside every morning to remind you to bend a knee to His will every day, fasting, etc.
  2. spiritual exercises–prayer, authentic community: take off your mask with a close friend daily/weekly (confess and share the intimate details of your life), time in God’s word, or as Francisco has said: “When I wake up every morning, Jesus is waiting for me.” (a focus on Jesus throughout the day, and looking for God moments even in the tough times of your day)

PLEASE read Dave’s wonderful comment below (just click on the ‘1 comment’ in yellow in the right hand corner of this post or click on this post title and you will be sent to a page with his comment below).

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The Science of Loss

“A pair psychologist from the University of Michigan recently conducted a fascinating study that shed some neurological light on the fear of loss.  First, volunteers donned caps containing electrodes.  Then they engaged in a computer simulated betting game, while researchers analyzed their brain electrical activity in response to winning and losing.  With each bet, the medial frontal cortex in her brain showed increased electrical activity with any matter of milliseconds.  But what intrigued the researchers was that negativity showed a larger dip after a loss and positivity rose after her win.  In fact, during a string of setbacks, medial frontal negativity dipped lower and lower.  Each loss was compounded by the previous loss.  Researchers came to a simple yet profound conclusion: losses loom larger than games.  In other words, the aversion to loss of a certain magnitude is greater than the attraction to gain of the same magnitude.”-Mark Batterson, Chasing the Holy Spirit, Purpose Driven Connection, volume 1, pg 84-85

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Mother’s Day Advice on Parenting

Uberlumen has been lacking parenting content.  This is a lecture from a panel of mom’s on mother’s day.  They have incredible wisdom and insights into parenting.  Here are a few points:

  • Thankfulness is the password into God’s presence
  • Our family of origin has SO MUCH influence on who we become
  • Christ can heal our family of origin wounds
  • Our marriages shape our children’s character

Please share with us your thoughts and learnings after you listen to these amazing women share their lives and parenting wisdom.

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Men’s Group: Fellowship from Calvary Road, May 13, 2009

The progression of the chapters in Calvary Road is significant.  We started with brokenness, then went to confession/cleaning our lives (cups) up so we can fill them with the Holy Spirit, and now we turn to fellowship.

Years ago I kept secrets from my wife, and one day I finally ‘confessed’ and ‘cleaned’ out ALL the skeletons in my closet (cup).  It was a scary, crazy, and bold move that kept us up talking until 3am.  I was scared of her not forgiving me and not understanding me.  She did both.

Shortly after my cup was clean 2 things happened.  My marriage went from great to amazing.  The comfort in KNOWING that there was nothing to hide freed us up to have a depth and peace and intimacy that I would have never dreamed of.  

The second thing that happened is that I learned to share my dirty cup with other men.  I found several men who were willing and that I felt save enough with to share my deepest fears and struggles.  I talk and meet with these men weekly.  This has transformed my relationship with my wife, with Christ, and with everyone around me.  A very large weight has been lifted from my soul, and I have a place to run and hide when things get overwhelming.

Hession in chapter 3-The Way of Fellowship outlines the importance of fellowship in shaping our lives and our relationships with our spouses, our friends, and our God.

Through the years, I have continued to try and coach and encourage other men to ‘date’ each other.  There is a richness to life that is sorely lacking without this process.  But it takes men SO LONG and most NEVER are able or willing to get there.  

The only way to do it is by finding a guy that you feel comfortable with and you take a few baby steps by sharing some private struggles or sins.  See how they respond, If they respond in kind and with understanding then dig deeper and continue to share more.  As you trust more and learn to share more, you will find that your marriage is better, your walk with Christ is deeper, and your life is richer.

Any questions?

Calvary Road, Chapter 3, Fellowship quotes:

But if we have not been brought into vital fellowship with our brother, it is a proof that to that extent we have not been brought into vital fellowship with God
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Sin always involves us in being unreal, pretending, duplicity, window dressing, excusing ourselves and blaming others–and we can do all that as much by our silence as by saying or doing something.
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The only basis for real fellowship with God and man is to live out in the open with both.
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Spurgeon defines it in one of his sermons as “the willingness to know and be known.”
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We must be willing not only to know, but to be known by him for what we really are. That means we are not going to hide our inner selves from those with whom we ought to be in fellowship; we are not going to window dress and put on appearances; nor are we going to whitewash and excuse ourselves. We are going to be honest about ourselves with them. We are willing to give up our spiritual privacy, pocket our pride and risk our reputations for the sake of being open and transparent with our brethren in Christ.
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We have not necessarily got to tell everybody everything about ourselves. The fundamental thing is our attitude of walking in the light, rather than the act. Are we willing to be in the open with our brother–and be so in word when God tells us to?
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When the barriers are down and the masks are off, God has a chance of making us really one. But there is also the added joy of knowing that in such a fellowship we are “safe.”
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Jesus wants you to begin walking in the light with Him in a new way today. Join with one other–your Christian friend, the person you live with, your wife, your husband. Drop the mask.

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Part 5: Can the resurrection show us God?

This is the 5th of 5 lectures/sermons in the Show me God series.  This was taught by Bucky on Easter Sunday.  It points out the importance and power of the resurrection.  As Paul said, “If Christ hasn’t come back to life, our message has no meaning and your faith also has no meaning.” (1Co 15:14 GW)

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Married Life Live, Session 2: Only Jesus can heal wounds.

Enjoy the notes and the brief audio teaching from our second Married Life Live session.
MEN’s ANSWERS:
What is your wound?
  • performance wound
  • not enough wound
  • distand dad and/or mom
  • not sensitive (family of origin-distant-did not express feelings)
  • non-emotional-grow up afraid of emotions/expression of emotions
  • self sufficient wound (can do life on own)
How does your wife help that wound?
  • acts of service
  • words of affirmation
  • touch
  • quality time
  • gifts
What role does Jesus play in your marriage?
  • put Jesus first–then marriage will follow
  • let Him rule, submit to Him otherwise it doesn’t work
  • Jesus is the glue.
  • example of forgiveness & grace
  • unconditional
  • grow closer to Him by prayer, reading Bible, fellowship
WOMEN’S ANSWERS:
What is your wound?
  • avoid conflict
  • perfection
  • inadequate
  • feeling valued/desirable
  • not loved
  • lack confidence
  • favoritism/suppressed feelings
How does your husband hurt that wound?  
  • expectation
  • criticism: this is a BIG one.  It is NEVER worth it! You WILL NOT change him/her by criticism.
  • trying to fix a problem
  • feeling not valued or under valued and undesirable
How does your husband help that wound?
  • open and share
  • healthy disagreement
  • acceptance
  • speaking truth
  • gentleness
  • support/encoragement
  • perspective
What role does Jesus play in your marriage?
  • unconditional love
  • Jesus loves us/rejoices in us
*KEY is to identify the wounds/issue because that helps to heal, recognize when they pop up, and focus on Christ to heal them.  Spouse can’t fix/heal the wound, but we can minister to the wound as Jesus heals it.
*CRITICISM:  It is NEVER worth it! You WILL NOT change him/her by criticism. My wife used to try this–ex. ‘you really should…find some friends that would be good for you etc…only when she gave up the criticism and started to pray did I start to make some of the changes that she desired.  We have to remember that criticism is painful, counter productive, and never works to change us so DON’T DO IT.  Love him/her just the way they are!
*DON’T try and fix it…it is usually the husband who wants to ‘fix’ the problem but whoever it is DON’T do it.  LISTEN and only fix if asked to.
*AFFIRM, AFFIRM, AFFIRM: in all discussions/arguments, lead with affirmation and don’t stonewall or run away…meet the problem head on by talking and listening.  A woman who stonewalls or runs from conflict with a husband who is from a stoic or non-emotional upbringing is very hurtful.  A man from such a family of origin needs empathy and support not stonewalling.
*Allow Jesus to delight in YOU!
“…the LORD takes delight in his people…”-Psalm 149:4.
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In the beginning was the Word…

John wrote these profound words to start his gospel.  Do words have power? Do words have more importance than we realize?  John was clearly stating to his audience that Jesus was God and that He was the Word which in Greek is logos (where we get the word logic in English).

I have come across something very interesting and if true, very powerful.  If this is true and accurate, it implies that the very fabric of the universe is ‘powered’ by the Word.

There is a man who has played music and taped words written on paper to glasses of water and then photographed the water molecules (scroll down on this website to read an interview of him).  The water molecules seem to change after being ‘spoken’ to.  What is the skeptics response to this? Please share with us if you have any thoughts.

“After seeing water react to different environmental conditions, pollution and music, Mr. Emoto and colleagues decided to see how thoughts and words affected the formation of untreated, distilled, water crystals, using words typed onto paper by a word processor and taped on glass bottles overnight. The same procedure was performed using the names of deceased persons. The waters were then frozen and photographed.”

Before and After Prayer

Love'you make me sick'

The image on the left is from the word: LOVE on the water glass.  The image on the right is from the words: ‘you make me sick’ on the water glass….hmmm……

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Men’s Group: May 6, 2009 Filling the Cup

We discussed chapter 2 of Calvary Road today.  It discusses the importance of brokenness and confession in our lives so that we are willing and ready to be filled by the Holy Spirit to ‘spill out’ the spirit of God onto others around us.  The exercise of brokenness and confession helps for us to get out of the way so God can drive/lead.  

Francisco shared what “personal and daily revival” means to him:

“Jesus is waiting for me when I get up.”  

What would the world be like if followers of Jesus lived like this?  Imagine if you lived a life of anticipation and joy knowing that as soon as you opened your eyes every morning, Jesus was there smiling and waiting for you!  Take away the worry and anxiety and all the stuff packed into our minds, and start each day as an adventure with Jesus.

Quotes from Calvary Road:

“Revival itself is being absolutely filled to overflowing with the Holy Spirit, and that is victorious living.”

“If we were asked this moment if we were filled with the Holy Spirit, how many of us would dare to answer “yes”? Revival is when we can say “yes” at any moment of the day.”

“People imagine that dying to self makes one miserable. But it just the opposite. It is the refusal to die to self that makes one miserable. The more we know of death with Him, the more we shall know of His life in us, and so the more of real peace and joy.”
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Did you know? The early church had a choice not to be persecuted.

In Mike Erre’s newest book: Death by Church he points out that the early church had a choice not to undergo persection.  “…if the early church had wanted itself and its purpose to be construed in privatistic and individualistic terms, there were abundant cultal and legal resources at hand for them to do just that.  The early church could have easily escaped Roman persecution by suing for status as a cultus privatus, or ‘private cult’ dedicated to ‘the pursuit of a purely personal and otherworldly salvation for its members’ like many other religious groups in that world.  yet instead of adopting the language of the privatized mystery religions, the church confronted Caesar, not exactly on his own terms but with his own terms.”-Clapp, Peculiar People, pg 81

This is amazing.  The early church chose to rebel and go defiantly up against Caesar because of their confidence and faith that Christ was the only true king!

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Part 4: Does suffering show us God?

This is the 4th of a 5 part series that we did at Pathways Church.  Bucky does a powerful job of sharing the uniqueness of Christianity and the power of the cross to help us during our suffering.  Evil and suffering is a topic of great concern to all of us.  We have a history of posts on this important topic that you can review by simply scrolling down and looking to the right to see under the categories section: Evil and Suffering link.

As always, please share your thoughts with us.

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Men’s Group April 22, 2009: Calvary Road

Men on the Path will be starting one of the most impactual books that I have done: Calvary Road by Roy Hession

We have ordered copies for anyone who doesn’t have a copy yet.  There is also a great study guide/work book which you will enjoy to augment Calvary Road book.

Join us for this life changing book on the TRUE message of the cross: brokenness & belovedness.

Our first meeting today was a review of the Preface & Introduction.  You can review the questions and teaching points, and thought provoking teaching and discussion time.  We wrestled with our hearts that are both broken and beloved.  

We would LOVE your thoughts on the mystery of Scripture stating that our hearts are ‘wicked’ but as Christians, Jesus dwells within our hearts….

Further resources:

Holiness by J.C. Ryle

Waking the Dead by John Eldgridge

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Passover and the Cross

I missed yet another ‘God moment’ when I was listening in to a discussion between 2 families about passover and the cross.  Lacking the courage and/or energy to speak up, I listened as the Jewish family and the Catholic family had this dialogue with the conclusions that the passover and the cross are stories that shared from each other and just happen to fall on the same days this year.  I proceeded to try and share with my sister the incredible parallel’s between the passover and the cross during our Good Friday dinner discussions.

We have lost sight of the incredible and miraculous design of the Bible: “The old testament is the new testament concealed and the new testament is the old testament revealed.”-Chuck Missler

One historical event that is truly miraculous and shows us the overwhelming design of the Bible message is the passover and its foretelling of Jesus and his ministry.

Enjoy Mike’s great message as he points out some of the incredible connectedness between the passover and the cross.

  • I have always thought that the plagues in Exodus were just random and honestly very bizarre choices for God to make–locust, frogs, etc…BUT Mike points out that each plague represented God’s very specific and intential counter to each of the major Egyptian false gods.  Once again our western minds and education miss the point and see the choice of plagues as funny and random to satisfy our desire to make fun at the Bible and it’s ‘God’; when in reality, the God of the Bible is VERY real and chose each plague carefully to point out to the Egyptian people that they were worshipping false gods/idols!
  • The Jewish slaves had 2 problems–slavery and the wrath of God just as we have the same 2 problems today (as Paul points out in Ephesians 2)–slavery to sin and the wrath of God.
  • wrath of God:  1. God’s wrath is used to do all that can be done to eliminate sin and 2. again our western mind set now is fixated on God’s love and ignore His Holiness.  But the new testament teaches a different covenant but NOT a different God–the entire Bible teaches of God’s Holiness (His only attribute that is emphasized in the Old Testament by Isaiah’s statement: Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord…).  With His holiness comes His wrath against anything that is not holy–i.e. our sin! 3. When we sin and God allows it to continue–that is His judgment; when we sin and we get caught–now that is His mercy… 4. God’s wrath and love merge at the cross.

Enjoy Mike’s sermon and please share your thoughts.

Here is a GREAT summary of the passover and the cross–the golden thread of redemption and the incredible design proven by prophecy and foreshadowing in the Bible is AMAZING!

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Luke 18: The rich young ruler & all of His homes

Greg Boyd hits 2 homeruns in a row with these 2 sermons.  The first discusses that age old challenge of the rich young ruler who approaches Jesus and asks Him what must he do to inherit eternal life, and the second discusses Jesus’ comments later on in Luke 18 regarding who is your mother, brother etc….  Both are powerful and moving.

  • The die to stuff exercise at the end of the first is really revealing and powerful
  • The community of Christ teaching that can truly transform our communities throughout the second is inspiring and challenging.

As always share with us your comments.

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Men’s Group: March 25, 2009 What is your favorite book to read?

Enjoy Dave’s insights about our latest men’s group:

Robby and Bucky teamed up at last Wednesday’s Men of the Path to cover the subject matter of one of the most difficult sessions we’ve had. It was on the value to us, as men, of one book. That book is sometimes called by names such as, The Book of Books, The Owner’s Manual for Life, the Good Book, or Basic Instructions Before Leaving Earth. Of course we are talking about the Bible. No matter what name we use, one thing is clear; the Bible is the Word of God. The icebreaker last week was, “What is your favorite book to read?” It stumped most of us; heck, we’re men, we don’t read unless it has to do with sports or work, right? I don’t know why, but I was stumped on how to answer this question. I knew what the answer “should be,” but it wasn’t the truth; at least I was not comfortable saying the “should” answer. For some reason my tongue was tied. I’ve read a lot of books. In the approximately 12 months I was at Taft, I read more than 36. {If you are wondering what “Taft” is, then go to Drew’s website, www.uberlumen.com, and listen to my testimony, among the many great things for men.} I read some great books; being a new Christian I absorbed them like a sponge. Books like, “Mere Christianity,” “The Screwtape Letters,” the entire “Left Behind” series, “Wild at Heart” and, of course, the Bible. I’m convinced I was tongue-tied on an answer to the “favorite book” question because of the lack of time I spend today in God’s Word. What many of us did was start naming our favorite book of the Bible. It was sad, but at the same time, that fit right into what Robby and Bucky wanted to talk about. Robby and Bucky used Psalm 119:9-16 to stress that the amount of time we spend reading and meditating on the Bible is “serious business.” Please take a moment to read Psalm 119:9-16. Every line talks about God’s Word, doesn’t it? These eight lines say so much. Even though most of us didn’t have answers to that icebreaker we all had answers for the other questions, “What does the Word of God mean to your life?,” Why is the Word of God a useful tool for us as men?” and “How does the Word of God make us more like Jesus? Bucky closed with some “shoulds.” He said the Bible “should” ignite a fire under our bellies. Bucky said the Bible “should” be the final authority in your life (it “should” be the book you consult for everything in your life). Bucky said we “should” spend at least 30 minutes a day in God’s Word. Five minutes a day is not enough for us in the OC; it is like a snack. Here in the OC we need a meal. I’d like to ask that you spend some time “feasting” on the Psalm 119: 9-16 and the preceding questions. Email your thoughts to Bucky and/or Robby. These guys put a lot of time into Wednesday mornings and would love to hear from you. It would be great if those of you that cannot attend take some time to email your comments to Bucky and/or Robby. Their addresses are on this email. Enjoy your time with God and His Word this week.