Category Archives: Spiritual Growth

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Men’s Topic #6: Love the one you’re with

Our topic this week was about LOVING your spouse.  In our OC world everyone is looking for more, coveting, and thinking that ‘the grass is always greener’.   If you want a GREAT marriage, you have to stop looking at the other lawns and stop and water your own grass! i.e. a GREAT marriage takes SACRIFICE and HARD WORK and COMMITTMENT to LOVE her with CHRIST’S LOVE!

Our Scripture for this week is: Ephesians 5:25-33

Here is Dave’s summary email:

I want to thank Robby for being a man of courage; it isn’t easy getting up in front of a bunch of men when you are the youngest and possibly the least experienced in the group regarding the topic you were speaking on. Robby spoke on Ephesians 5:25-33. If you haven’t read it in a while please do so. It offers great marital advice. Robby told us how he sees love – as an action word, not a feeling. Love, Robby said, is not about us but about other people. Verse 25 states, “Husbands, love your wives as Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her.” Then, smack dab in the middle of those verses is the line, “He who loves his wife loves himself.” Wow, pretty powerful, huh?

Some things that went around the room during our discussion time were:

– Love has nothing to do with the physical and everything to do with the heart

– Jesus is our love coach

– Marriages get neglected in the name of material success

– Show love by praying with and for one another; you cannot be angry with someone if you are praying with/for them

– Know your spouse’s “love language,” whether it is gifts, affirmation, physical touch, time or service (from Gary Chapman’s book, The Five Love Languages)

– Spend some quality, uninterruptible time on the couch with your spouse when you first get home from work (“couch time”)

– Get rid of your television and your children’s cell phones

– If together, we can keep our eyes focused on Jesus rather than the imperfect human beings we are, and ask Him to love our spouse through us, we will grow closer to Him and to our spouse – as you both grow closer to Christ you grow closer to each other….

As always, please share your thoughts/comments with us!
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MARRIAGE TIPS & RESOURCES

Marriage is hard work, but it is worth the effort.

If you are having a hard time with your marriage:

1. Don’t give up! Studies show that divorce can be truly devastating to you, your spouse, and especially your kids.1 2

2. Get professional help!  Don’t try and work through your issues on

your own. Read these books, go to marriage retreats, and get into

consistent marriage counseling.

3. Set down healthy patterns! Find or read about good patterns and then follow them.

 

RESOURCES:

MARRIAGE TOP 10 ‘TIPS’

 

BOOKS TO READ:

1. The Five Love Languages by Gary Chapman

2. His Needs, Her Needs by Willard F. Hartley

3. The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John M. Gottman

4. Love & Respect: The Love She Most Desires,The Respect He Desperately Needsby Emerson Eggerichs

5. Night Light: A Devotional for Couples by the Dobson’s

 

As always, PLEASE share with us your insights and comments below.

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Dave K interview Part #1

Please enjoy listening to Dave tell his AMAZING faith journey.  This first of three parts points out the OC lifestyle as seen by a Jersey boy (and the world).  A helpful reminder that we live in an incredibly materialistic place.  Dave has become an incredible man of faith through his journey.  Here are a few words from Dave:

“I was thinking about how much my present day situation fits with today’s lesson of “are you enough?”  If you think about it, if I paid attention to the world around me, the OC lifestyle would definitely tell me I wasn’t nearly enough.  I…have no assets other than a 2001 Nissan Sentra and live pretty much paycheck to paycheck (mainly due to restitution).  But, because I follow God and not the world, I have a genuine smile on face and countless blessings.  It is amazing how little you really need.  If we look back only about 50 years, how big were our parents’ and grandparents’ homes?  How many baths did they have?  Life was smaller and better but Satan is out there convincing many that bigger is better and what they have isn’t good enough.  People take their eyes off of God and look at what others have…”

Please share with us your thoughts.

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Men’s Topic #5: PRAYER

Here are the notes from Dave on Men’s Group Topic #5: Prayer  

On Wednesday we reviewed Luke 11:5-13 and Luke 18:1-7 (please read, or re-read them before continuing). 

Bucky makes so many great points each week it is a challenge to write about just one or two.  I selfishly get to pick the ones that touch my heart and pray they will touch yours, too.

We all know where Bucky’s heart is on the subject of prayer because he stated on Wednesday, “the best thing we could do is pray.”  I’ve been blessed to be able to attend a few events with Bucky and one thing he makes sure happens is that prayer is part of the event.  For example, after serving those in need at the City of Hope shelter a couple of months ago we stood in front of the door and Bucky led us in prayer.  Bucky often says how he walks around the Northwood neighborhood and prays before service.  So it did not surprise me when our discussion this week focused on prayer. When all is said and done if we do not become men of prayer we will never know God.  We can “study” His word all we want but we will never know Him.  Prayer is nothing more than talking to God; it is not ceremonial or ritualistic; it is a conversation with our Lord and Savior.  Bucky said we can go through the routine of prayer but if it is just rote that is disconnected from your heart it will not accomplish anything.  Prayer needs a willing and wanting heart.  Getting on your knees at the beginning and/or end of each day and praying is something to be done not out of “duty” but out of desire.  How else can you get to know God if you do not talk to Him? Another point Bucky made was that each morning when the disciples awoke they usually found Jesus out alone, praying.  He was talking to His Abba.  Jesus’ Abba is our Abba, too.  The point of Luke 11:5-13, is to show us God isn’t a grouchy Father, but a Good Neighbor; the One we can talk to anytime, anywhere.  If we knock, He will answer.  God is always there for us.  A little while back Bill Gaultiere had Cynthia and me demonstrate the “prayer hug” we do almost every morning.  It is amazing how Cynthia looks forward to starting her day knowing I’ve cared enough to embrace her and whisper my prayer to God in her ear.  As men, God wants us to be the spiritual heads of our households.  The best thing we can do for our families doesn’t involve anything in this world (no college funds, hedge funds, mutual funds, etc.); it is prayer.  Try it, and like the woman in Luke 18:1-7, do not give up; continue to pray.  Remember it is in His timing not ours. 
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Prayer is Invading the Impossible

I had the honor to teach at Men of Influence this week.  This is the men’s group at Mariners Church that I used to go to until I moved over to Men on the Path at Pathways Church.  It is an amazing group of men, and they have chosen an AMAZING book to go through: Prayer is Invading the Impossible by Hayford.  We discussed these questions:

  1. Is God good? How do you know that God is good?
  2. Does Satan exist? How do you know?
  3. Why do bad things happen to good people?  Where do bad things come from?
  4. What role do your prayers have in accomplishing God’s will?

I mentioned these 2 books as GREAT resources:

  1. Never Give Up! by Nancy Missler: A LIVE CHANGING book concerning trials and tribulations
  2. The Invisible War by Chip Ingram: What Every Believer Needs to Know about Satan, Demons, and Spiritual Warfare

Please enjoy my brief audio teaching and slides, and as always, please share your comments!

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Men’s Topic #4: Servanthood

Please enjoy this audio of Bucky’s teaching about servanthood and here is Dave’s summary:

Please take a few minutes and re-read John 13.  Then use your remaining time to reflect on what we learned from each other today:

  1. Verse 1 says, “…he showed them the full extent of his love.”  Love always gives itself away for the benefit of another. 
  2. You must receive service (from God and others) before you can serve others.  You cannot give what you have not received.  Bucky gave us a few great personal examples that would take up too much space here (if you’d like to know ask Bucky or someone that attended on Wednesday).  God serves us by His grace in allowing us to enter into a relationship with Him now, as we are.  We must spend time with God to further that relationship. No relationship lasts if time isn’t spent with the other person in the relationship.  God is no different – if we want to know Him better, we must make time for Him. 
  3. As usual, Jesus led by example.  He did not ask His disciples to do anything He hadn’t already done.  And, of course, it was done in complete humility. Humility is the absence of pride. 

Can you see the correlation between our teacher and the disciples’ Teacher? Bucky leads by personal example with humility.  That is why we all love and respect Bucky.  He is transparent; he is not afraid to make his life an open book.  We don’t see Bucky as “Super Pastor,” but as one of us.   Well, Jesus desires that same love and respect from us.  It just takes time guys; are you ready to give it?

Share what you learned this week with a friend, co-worker, neighbor or family member.  When they see you lead with humility they will want what you have.

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House of Speed Training for our kids

A Christian brother of mine that lives in my neighborhood has started a new adventure.  He was my youngest son’s AYSO soccer coach so I know that he is truly AMAZING with kids.  I hope and pray that his new adventure continues to grow and prosper.  Here is an email about what House of Speed is all about and the layout of each training session.  Questions? Call Denny!  Denny Spruce at 949.706.7035-office or 949.500.0015-cell or denny.spruce@houseofspeed.com

Here is the flow of each session:

  • Character Discussion- This includes scripture, references, and/or discussions about what it is and how it looks.
  • Dynamic Range of Motion (DROM)- These exercises not only get the kids warmed up safely, they also train the muscles to get into the proper position for optimal speed, agility, and explosiveness. 
  • Skip Drills- These exercises emphasize getting the right body parts in the right positions and applying force to through those positions.  They need the muscle memory to make this happen with each step and without thinking.
  • Work-out Drills- These routines are used to train and develop specific muscles and movements.  This may include ladder drills to core strengthening to resistance training.
  • Play- Just what it sounds like, but they getting to use what they learn.
  • Prayer- Closing prayer

We videotaped the group running during the first session and we will video new members each week.  In the next week or so we will video everyone again.  We will then show them elite athletes, their first run, and their second run and give feedback.

Also in the next week or so we will start to time them in certain drills and runs.  These times will be posted on the My Speed section of the House of Speed website which you will have access to.  They will be able to chart their progress and be able to compare themselves to other HOS athletes of the same age, gender, etc.  They will also be able to see the national HOS records.  They are pretty impressive. 

Here is a complete summary that should field any other questions:  House of Speed

Enjoy this brief interview with Denny, and as always please leave your comments!


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An Encounter with God

The Christians in the miracles and healing and spiritual gifts movements call it an encounter with God…I am wondering what in the world that is and means!  My friend, who you have listened to regarding miracles and healings, invites me to come to his last teaching engagement of the summer before he goes back to the mission field.  At the end of the service, I am watching him laying hands on people for healing etc.  There is a very strange woman rocking back and forth and waving her hands in the corner of the church.  This woman later walks up to me with her friend and asks to pray for me…as she is praying she is humming and talking jibberish aka speaking in tongues? but the English that she is speaking/praying out loud is about what God has put on her heart to share with me–God tells her-through prayer-things about me and my family that ONLY God could know! WOW!  What can a skeptic like me say to this?!!  The Christians who walk in these circles call it ‘getting your mail read’ when someone prays for you and speaks things that ONLY God could know about you.

What do you think?

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Miracles and Healings #4

In this 4th and final interview with my missionary friend who lives in the middle east, we hear some insights on ‘how to’ do healings and miracles.  We also learn to ask ‘what do I expect?’  Can we train our mind and heart to expect the supernatural? And what does it take to do miracles and healings?

I came across this fascinating dialogue between the main character, Mack, and God in the parable story entitled “The Shack”:

“But what about all the miracles? The healings?…Doesn’t that prove that Jesus was God–you know, more than human?”

“No, it proves that Jesus is truly human….Although he is also fully God, he has never drawn upon his nature as God to do anything.  He has only lived out of his relationship with [God the Father], living in the very same manner that I desire to be in relationship with every human being…”

“So, when he healed the blind?”

“He did so as a dependent, limited human being trusting in [God’s] life and power to be at work within him and through him.  Jesus, as a human being, had no power within himself to heal anyone.”–excerpt from The Shack, pg 99-100

If this is true, then we should also see healings and miracles as we trust in HIM?!

What do you think???

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Men’s Topic #3: 3 Attacks on our Identity as men

Bucky taught us from Matthew 4:1-11.  Jesus prepared Himself for his encounter with satan by fasting for 40 days and nights! We lose sight of the fact that ‘fasting IS feasting’ on God and His word.  Fasting and prayer and meditation on His word doesn’t weaken us but strengthens us for battle.

There are 3 temptations/3 attacks that the world and satan use to attack our identity:

  1. performance trap: world tries to convince us that our identity is linked to our performance
  2. control trap: world tries to convince us that our identity is linked to how much power/control we have
  3. worldly possession trap: world tries to convince us that we are what we own
What is the cure for this pack of lies, attacks, temptations?
  1. Our identity DOES NOT come from what we do but who we are to God.  We are His beloved!
  2. Our identity DOES NOT come from our power and control but our job is to submit and put our trust in God.  We must give over our control to God.
  3. Our identity DOES NOT come from our stuff.  We are NOT what we own!
note: we also talked about how the world and satan love to isolate men.  Being in community, in fellowship with other men is essential!
As always PLEASE leave us your thoughts/insights etc by clicking on the “0 comments” in yellow at the bottom of this post and leave a comment.
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Vital Signs of Healing: VALUE-Are You Enough? Lecture

Please enjoy a brief lecture on the Vital Signs of Healing: VALUE asking the age old question are you enough?

There are 4 books that I mention during this lecture:

How to Win Friends and Influence People by Dale Carnegie

The Return of the Prodigal Son by Henri Nouwen

The 5 Love Languages by Gary Chapman

The Bible

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Vital Signs of Healing: VALUE-Are You Enough? Q&A

This is the GREAT discussion time that we had concerning VALUE.  Join us! Share with us YOUR answers and please leave us a comment below.

The Vital Signs of Healing: VALUE handout: vital signs of healing: value

Here is a brief list of YOUR answers to this VITAL question:

What are some ways that we can show our patients that we think that they have value or that we think that they are ‘enough’?

  • put yourself at their level
  • eye contact
  • show kindness and help out even when it is not your patient
  • do a little extra if you see a need
  • getting to know them beyond their chief complaint
  • communicate consistency between the doctor and the nurse
  • not about you
PLEASE share with us YOUR answers by posting a comment below. THANKS for joining us!
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Vital Signs of Healing: VALUE-Are You Enough? Introduction

Enjoy this brief audio introduction to the curriculum entitled: Vital Signs of Healing.  There are 4 physical vital signs and 4 Vital Signs of Healing: Love, Value, Virtue, and Healing.  This is an introduction to a lecture about the Vital Sign: VALUE.  We had this picture up on the screen for part of our discussions:

Who do YOU most relate to in this picture? And why? Please leave us your insights by adding a comment below.

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Men’s Topic #2: Are you enough?

Topic #2 is based on the story of the prodigal son from Luke 15.  This brief audio is about a LIFE CHANGING concept that will improve your marriage and relationships.  We are all walking around with the ‘I am not enough’ wound that society and our parents have given us.  This wound can only truly be healed by God, but our wives/s.o./friends can help heal this wound.  Please add your thoughts, questions, and comments below this post!

 

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Paul Young speaks and preaches AGAIN

This is the 1 of 4 teachings from July 2008 at Mariners Church when the author of the amazing book: The Shack spoke.  (There are 4 separate podcasts that you can listen from Mariners Church podcast; these 2 are the best of the 4.)

As always please share with us your thoughts by leaving a comment.

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Men’s Topic #1: Where is your treasure?

Here is a GREAT email from Dave summarizing Men’s Topic #1 (and I have added 2 audio’s–Bucky’s teaching points and the debrief insights time): Where is your treasure?

The passages from Matthew that we talked about Wednesday are among my all time favorites. (For those unable to attend we covered Matthew 6: 19-34. You may wish to take a moment and read it before going further.)

Bucky covered so much this morning as he talked about Jesus’ Life Investment Strategy:

  1. One of the key words in these passages is “treasure.”  When we hear that word most of us think in terms of physical things – material possessions; but Jesus meant it as the order of the heart.
  2. We all have a treasure box – our hearts. What do you have in your treasure box? (“For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”)
  3. We tend to organize our lives around our investment strategy. We need to organize it around God’s Kingdom and all else will follow. (“Seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all of these things will be given to you as well.”)
  4. It is impossible to treasure two things equally. We cannot have one foot in the world and one foot in the Kingdom. It does not work; one will eventually dominate. (“There shall be no other gods before me.”)
  5. The treasure isn’t something we get when we die (like some prize); it is here and now. The Book of Matthew is the Gospel of the Kingdom and it tells us the Kingdom of Heaven is here and now. We can have the eternal, abundant life today. Something Cynthia and I do each morning is pray together and one of the prayers we use is the one Dr. Bill G. gave us a few months back.  Ask Bill or me if you’d like a copy.

So, what does God treasure? He treasures people, relationships and the creative order of things. As you re-read these passages look for how God tells us about how He takes care of all things that honor Him. Don’t be afraid to take that step. Tell God you want to turn your life over to Him (“thy will be done”). “You will find rest for your soul.”

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Miracles and Healings #3

So what is the big deal about healing? Isn’t the point of healing and miracles to lead people to salvation? Yes it is a way to lead people to salvation, but healing and miracles are showing God’s LOVE and communicating God’s LOVE to those in need.  What better way to show God’s LOVE than to healing someone from their illness?

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Paul Young SPEAKS about The Shack etc.

This is the 1 of 4 teaching sessions from Mariners Church by Paul Young author of the amazing, must read book: The Shack.  In this session he shares some of his life’s experiences and answers some of the common questions people have about the book. (There are 4 separate podcasts that you can listen from Mariners Church podcast; these 2 are the best of the 4.)

Please share your thoughts with us here at UBERLUMEN by posting a comment.