It took me some time to see it (15 years), but it finally dawned on me as I observed another doctor do it. I saw a patient who was dying of end stage liver disease from alcoholism. The first question that the admitting doctor asked the patient was “When was the last time that you had a drink?” How is that relevant at the end of this patients life?
I have been guilty of this as well. I have seen patients dying of lung cancer that I have asked if they smoked and how much. WHY?!! There is no medical reason to ask. We ask these types of questions because it makes us feel better. We think to ourselves: 1. They are to blame for their demise and 2. I won’t get this horrible disease because I don’t smoke or I don’t drink.
The blame game does NOTHING to help with the suffering, the evil, the tragedies, the messes of life. We must rise above the blame game to ask ourselves how can I help others through this and to help heal the pain with God’s help.
We all play the blame game and look for someone to blame.