#8 Emotionally Intelligent Moment of 2010

EQ Moment #8:
Conan O’Brien Statement: I Will Not Follow Jay at 12:05

Emotional intelligence is the skill that makes you look graceful under pressure. It also helps you to earn people’s respect by allowing you to communicate clearly and directly, even when you’d rather be hiding under a rock. Conan O’Brien did both in January when he was given, and was promptly relieved of, the job of a lifetime—hosting The Tonight Show on NBC.

It was a confusing situation, to say the least. Conan took over The Tonight Show when Jay Leno, the previous Tonight Show host, started a new program in an earlier time slot. Leno’s new show suffered from an extended period of poor ratings, and on January 10th, NBC told Conan that they’d be moving Leno back into his customary time slot, thereby sending Conan back to late-night programming. These decisions left Conan to wonder, Did Jay want The Tonight Show back because he was failing, or was NBC calling the shots? Whatever the situation, Conan was caught in the crossfire. Tonight Show fans wanted desperately for Conan to remain, yet the network made their intentions clear—go back to your old program or leave the network.

O’Brien needed to set the record straight but keep peace with all sides. He did so in a pitch-perfect response letter. The letter, addressed to “People of Earth,” adeptly shared fact with feeling in explaining the situation. It was honest, heartfelt, and personal. It shared his frustration with his predicament rather than simply bashing NBC. He knew how he was feeling (self-awareness), and he shared this openly and calmly (self-management). Despite the gravity of the situation, the letter didn’t spare the use of humor that his fans had come to love and expect (social awareness and relationship management). In short, Conan’s letter was an emotionally intelligent response at a difficult moment in his career, and it created the kind of closeness and intimacy with his fans that you can’t obtain any other way.

“Have a great day, and, for the record, I am truly sorry about my hair; it’s always been that way.”

Yours,

Conan

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